Where to begin…

Where to begin… Well, I just love food.

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I’ve struggled with weight (or should that be eating?) for many years. Now, those that know me will think that sounds ridiculous, because I’m not overweight – or at least, not right now. But I am a classic yo-yo dieter who is obsessed with food and weight – sometimes in a good way, sometimes not. I have weighed everywhere between 8st (112lbs for my NA friends) to 10st 4lbs (144lbs) – which was my heaviest when I lived in Calgary, Canada and consumed their delicious, juicy cattle, or coos if you’re Scottish, at an alarming rate – usually smothered with cheese and mayonnaise, in a large white bun. And who could resist the poutine?!? (Trust me, it’s A-MAZIN). The swing within those 32lbs is ongoing, and mainly contained within a 10lbs area, with occasional periods in the outlying areas, depending on whether I’m training for a half marathon or it’s the festive season!

Right now I’m somewhere around the middle of those two extremes. This sometimes bothers me, but I am working on not letting it bother me. Rewind back to a few months ago when I discovered The Whole 30®  and in turn the Paelo Diet, and thought it would change my life. I was delighted with how I was looking and more importantly how I felt. Then the holiday season arrived and I found myself back to square one, putting back on the weight I lost during my 34-day Whole 30. Turns out The Whole 30, as great as it is, can’t change my life, only I can.

I have to continually remind myself that I am not overweight, I am healthy and happy, and I look half-decent. But that’s easier said than done when your clothes don’t fit and the same pair of jeans gets washed continually because the other 10 pairs in the wardrobe won’t button up!

I am lucky enough to have a Fella who thinks I am his equivalent of Brad’s Angelina and wants to jump my bones (excuse the crudeness) at every opportunity. It’s a great tonic and really flattering. But the old adage about having to love yourself is unfortunately true. It doesn’t matter how much other people think I look good, to really feel it I have to believe it myself.

So, I am trying hard (and have been for years) to make a fundamental shift from  managing my weight and size, to being healthy, and eating for myself. I am some way there, and part of finding the sweet spot is to find a ‘diet’ (hate that word) which works for me and my body. It’s not just about how tight my clothes feel, it’s also about feeling really great and having the energy to embrace a busy lifestyle.

I try to think about this like a body bank account is – am I making regular deposits to my body’s savings account to provide for the future, or am I withdrawing and depleting the funds? And of course if I save a lot, I could afford to make a few withdrawls (if I were to fall ill for example, or if I wanted to eat an entire bag of Thai Sweet Chilli Sensations in one go whilst standing in the kitchen with my coat still on) without emptying the bank account (i.e. dying!).

So I’m here to share with you my love for food, experimenting, running, and weighty issues, and hopefully it will resonate or interest you too. I’ll publish my recipes, because I love cooking, and I just love food, but most of all I love sharing it with people.

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